*TLDR at the bottom for all your player haters.
“Heck yeah” I thought to myself when I read the text from Redbox. I went to the Redbox near work and picked-up Destiny. I’ve been itching to try it.
The rental screen said something about a possible 20gb install. I remember how long it took to install Metal Gear Solid for PS3 and hoped in the years since the process had improved.
Fast forward 8 hours later I am home. My wife is even pumped about me playing a console game for once, because you know Glorious PC Master Race stuff.
I put the disc in and wait out the dread PS3 updates. They were a quick 10 mins. Next the game starts doing stuff. Then some more stuff. Now it is asking me to purchase something from the PSN Store but it is free.
It is called Compatibility Pack 2. It is 1141 mb. If I was on my PC this download would take about 15 mins, but I am on the PS3 dealing with Sony shit so it is going to take 114 mins. Wait it is going up. Now it is 224 mins. Fuck. Now we have steadied out at 333 mins…
I am mad, but it is time to sleep and I have the PS3 set to shut off after a a period of no activity. I let it download over night.
Turn it on bright and early Saturday morning. I am pumped to get a day in and beat the single player campaign which is 10 hours according to some nerds online. Sorry Jared, I’m going to Scrooge McDuck the life out of you with another update for Destiny.
Notice this one is a measly 160something mb. “This may take a while”, that’s cute that it is warning me. I look at it again 40 mins later and it is not done yet. 2 hours later it is done. I hit next.
IS THIS FUCKING PURGATORY FOR ME? Now it has me back at the PSN Store or whatever the goob it is called having me purchase Compatibility Pack 1. I was dumb and assume the Compatibility Pack 2 it had me download first would have encapsulated Compatibility Pack 1. Dumb Me!
1.5 hours later I get to the point where the game is just ready to be played, but first it has to spin the disc around and do things that you have no idea of. Maybe it was looking for prime numbers (folding) and thinking about what I was thinking and reporting back to N. Korea. I don’t know. I’m just mad.
Finally at Noon I get to play the damn game. I can say I didn’t hate it but it took some dumb game design choices, like forcing me to go back to the home planet thing to turn in quests and do dumb stuff like decode weapons. I wouldn’t be so salty about it if it would have just loaded me back there after a mission, instead you get this cool view of your ship above earth, then you need to click “Navigation” and choose the home base thing and wait 1-5 mins for it to load.
The game was really easy until you got to the end boss, then it was overwhelmingly hard in an uncreative way. It felt like 90% of the missions ended by taking my robot thing that sounded like the Toonami robot and guarding it from onslaughts of baddies. It got so repetitious and frustrating because mobs would spawn behind me sometimes while I was on my 10 attempt at a boss. There could’ve been so many cool things to the story brought through fun game mechanics that just never showed up, so I just felt cheated at the end of each level.
I tried to finish the game, I wanted to so dearly. The game just didn’t have enough story content to get me to the correct level for the final stage. I tried to grind out some level but it just wasn’t happening for me. I was level 16 on the last level using every skill I had to get past bad dudes and ultimately on one of the final stage minibosses I just gave up angry.
Fun Parts: Playing coop with random people on the internet was sort of fun. The bosses were challenging in a boring way, like revolving shields or hizzilions of non-boss mobs running around being dicks. The PVP was fun enough for it to be the main attraction for people that took the risk and bought the game.
TLDR: 1 day rentals of games just don’t work anymore like they did up to xbox/ps2 because developers keep putting out buggy shit and the networks for the consoles including their update software are garbage.
Also Destiny is mediocre and DO NOT RENT IT because you will lose 8 hours of your life waiting to play it.
THE moral OF the STORY is: 1 day game rentals seem like a good idea, like being a non-smoker and smoking a cigarette when you’ve been drinking. Except the cigarette is over quickly and it burns your throat for the next couple of days because you are a pussy and it knows that.